Papa says only doctor or engineer is a "safe" career. How do I even talk to him?
Yash Tiwari11th Sample
27 Aug 2026 · 1 min read
Class 11 PCB, Lucknow. Meri problem simple hai but samajh nahi aa raha kaise bolun. Papa ke hisaab se career sirf do hain: doctor ya engineer. Baaki sab "risky". Unke friend ka beta animation karta hai aur papa uska example dete hain, "dekho wo ghar pe baitha hai".
Mujhe doctor banna bura nahi lagta (PCB lene ke reasons hain). But mujhe sports science, physiotherapy, maybe data stuff bhi interesting lagte hain, and I don't want to say it one day and have papa go quiet for a week.
Tried: ek baar maine bola "papa agar NEET nahi hua toh?" He said "aisa mat bol, shubh shubh bol". Then dinner was silent. Another day I showed him a video about different careers. He said "internet pe sab kuch hota hai".
What I want to know: how did you talk to your parents about alternatives without it becoming a fight? Is there a way to say "I'm trying NEET seriously, but I also want a plan B" without sounding like I'm already giving up? And is "safe career" even a real thing, or just a phrase?
12 answers & replies
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[+][–]Dev Agarwal12thSample· 1mo ago
I come from a business family so I see this from the other side. When a parent says "safe" they usually mean "predictable income". That fear is real. So don't argue with the word, answer the fear. Find two or three options in your list and write down roughly what the path is, how many years, what the first job looks like. Not a video, a one-page note. Parents who say "internet pe sab kuch hota hai" are not always against the idea, they're against not having facts.
[+][–]Yash Tiwari11thSample· 1mo agoAuthor
a one-page note, ok that's a good idea. Papa respects paper more than videos honestly.
[+][–]Zoya Khan12thSample· 1mo ago
Timing and tone matter. Not at dinner when he is tired, not after a bad test. I'd pick a calm Sunday and start with something like, "I'm working hard for NEET and I want to do it properly, and I also want to tell you what else I find interesting, because I don't want to hide it from you." It tells him you are not giving up, only being honest. Parents often hear "plan B" as "I'm already quitting". The word that helps is "insurance". Also, silence for a week doesn't always mean anger. Sometimes it means they're scared and don't know how to say it.
[+][–]Ishaan Bose11thSample· 1mo ago
brutal take: doctors never have job problems, that's why every parent says safe. Engineers too. It's not stupid, it's how they grew up.
[+][–]Rahul DubeyDropperSample· 1mo ago
Not fully true, Ishaan. Medical and engineering are respected, but it's not like every doctor or engineer has an easy life. There are years of training, more exams for specialising, and people with degrees who struggle to find the work they want. The respect is real and the "never a problem" part is not. It's worth saying kindly to your dad, too: "safe" is about the person and the effort, not just the degree.
[+][–]Ishaan Bose11thSample· 1mo ago
okay fair, "never" was me being dramatic. noted.
[+][–]Vivek Mishra12thSample· 1mo ago
My father also says the same thing, Yash. For us, a stable income is not a taste, it is a need, so I understand him. What helped me was telling him I'm doing my best at the main plan, and showing him in numbers that I have looked at the money. When he saw I had thought about income too, he relaxed a bit. I think maybe your papa's fear is about you, not about the career.
[+][–]Kabir Joshi11thSample· 1mo ago
For tech: parents think coding is a hobby until they see something that works. I built a small attendance app for my school's lab and my dad's reaction changed from "waste of time" to "can you do it for my office too". If you have a project, any project, show it. Doing beats explaining.
[+][–]Sara Fernandes11thSample· 1mo ago
Physio and sports science are real options and I think you're not wrong to like them, they're not "weird". But how you get into them depends on your state and the college, so don't tell papa something confident you've not verified. Find the actual route first, then tell him. I'm in the same boat with wanting medicine and football, parents think it's "either/or". It isn't, but it's easier to say it when you've done the homework.
[+][–]Harsh Gupta12thSample· 1mo ago
my dad says "safe career" = government job + pension + a daughter-in-law who cooks. I said I want none of these and now he's sad. Real answer though: dev and zoya have said it all. Facts on paper + calm Sunday + the word insurance. Also keep a snack ready. Parents listen better when there is chai.
[+][–]Lakshmi TripathiDropperSample· 1mo ago
I think the silence is the loud part. Maybe tell him what you tell us, that you want to try NEET properly. That is not weak.
[+][–]Yash Tiwari11thSample· 1mo agoAuthor
thanks sab ko. Plan: one-page note, calm Sunday, chai, "insurance" word. Will update if papa doesn't faint 😂
